Anxious…I think

Today is my last full day in Ankara. Wow. Let me say that again. Today is my last full day in Ankara. Yep didn’t work. It really isn’t setting in that my time here is just about to be up. Granted I finally started to pack last night – shocker I know. This time there were no 11 o’clock at night discussions over what luggage I should take between me and my parents because well I only have the luggage in my room. My room for only 36 more hours. Gosh. Still not setting in. Will it ever?

But yes I did start to pack and what did I realize, that it’s gonna be fun lugging me and my equal weighted luggage across the countrry tomorrow, but I will persevere. I made it from Italy to Germany with more luggage 2 years ago and well I can make it half-way across Turkey or so I tell myself. I’ve made the bus journey before so I am not worried for that, but yet I am still worried, or I think I am worried. What exactly is anxiety and the feeling of being anxious – not being able to put your finger on what you are feeling? If so that is exactly what is surging through my body right now.

Maybe I am just unsure of what to feel because my life is gonna be a whirlwind for the next month and I don’t know what to think about. To give you a little flash forward here’s the breakdown:

August 28th – Leave Ankara for the Big City of İstanbul. Move into my new digs at 11pm at night.

August 29th – Pack for my Euro Backpack Trip and fly to Paris in the afternoon and hang with my long lost program companion Allyce!!!! Go back one time zone

August 30th – Greet my friend Jess from the US and do Paris Live!

August 31st – Fly to Lisbon, Portugal. Go back one more time zone! Holy moly I will only be 6 hours ahead of my lovelies back in Illinois. That’s the closest we will be in a long time – a very long time.

September 1st-4th – Experience Portugal through sights, sounds and of course tastes

September 4th-8th – Experience Spain via all my senses. The Al Hambra – EEEEEEKKKKSSSS! and fly back to Paris

September 9th – Fly back to Istanbul! Wowsers

September 10th-12th University Orientation

September 13th-20th Become a Tour Guide for a week for my Parentals – ahhhhhhhh so excited to see you two and eat out on your wallet FPU – but really excited to see you two – I can’t contain my excitement!

September 21st-23rd – Maybe sleep??? Find my inner realm of peace and reflect on my life

September 24th – My semester starts

September 25th –> Start putting money back into my bank account.

And somewhere in the midst of all that I will get some runs in, I will hammock internationally and I will know what it feels like to be in a country where I don’t speak the language. Heck I may actually be praying to hear Turkish when it is all said and done with. Portuguese – you frighten me,  Spanish well  I gave up on you after 3 years and switched back to the mother tongue and then chose 2 more languages over you so you know where you stand. And French well I am just not able to sound as formal and proper as you require so I will stick with my limited vocabulary of please and thanky you that I will be scorned at by all Parisians no matter how hard I try. It seems as if I am a hater of languages now – but really I am not I just have my preferences of English, German, Italian and Turkish. I think my Italian may help me around, may being the keyword.

Yes I think that clearly classifies as a whirlwind of a month, if not well then I am not sure I could handle a whirlwind because that is overwhelming enough already as it is for me. And mapping that out was more for my own sanity I think…

With all of that laid out I will be quite busy, but I do hope to keep you all up to date on my activities.

Now I will just try and separate out all the mixed emotions running through me and keep my head screwed on right so that I can focus and pass my Turkish level exams! May luck be on my side.

Cheers from Ankara






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